Bdsm Terminology A-z

BDSM abbreviations

They have their origins in classified personal advertisements, where euphemisms for paraphilic and socially disapproved practices

ABDL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover): A form of ageplay where individuals receive gratification from role-playing as an infant or wearing and using diapers.
Aftercare: The period following a scene where participants decompress, discuss the experience, and provide emotional or physical comfort to return to reality.
BDSM: A catchall acronym for Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, and Sadism/Masochism used to describe the collective kink scene.
Blackmail: A consensual dynamic where a submissive provides potentially damaging material to a dominant to create a sense of forced obligation or non-consent.
Bondage: The practice of using physical restraints, such as rope or cuffs, to restrict the movement of a partner’s body or specific limbs.
Bottom: The partner who receives physical sensations or actions from a top during a scene.
Brat / Bratting: A submissive who consensually behaves mischievously or disobediently to provoke a specific response from their dominant.
Breast Bondage: The act of using restraints to tie, flatten, or highlight the breasts for aesthetic or physical sensation.
Breast Torture: The application of deliberate physical pain to the breasts for sexual gratification.
Breath Control Play: The intentional restriction of oxygen through methods like smothering or strangulation to heighten arousal.
Butt Plug: An anatomical sex toy designed for rectal insertion to provide pleasure, sometimes featuring tails for roleplay or locks for humiliation.
CBT (Cock and Ball Torture): The application of pain or pressure to the male genitals for sexual stimulation.
Chastity: A form of sexual denial where a person is prevented from accessing their genitals, often through the use of a locking device controlled by a partner.
CNC (Consensual Non-Consent): An agreement where participants roleplay scenarios involving a lack of consent while maintaining pre-negotiated boundaries and safewords.
Collared: A term describing a submissive who is formally "owned" by or committed to a dominant, often symbolized by wearing a neck collar.
Collaring: A formal ceremony or agreement where a dominant accepts a submissive’s service, similar to a commitment ritual or wedding.
Consent: The mutual, informed agreement between all parties regarding the activities and boundaries of a BDSM relationship or scene.
Contract: A formal document used to outline the expectations, limits, and specific dynamics of a BDSM relationship.
Contrapolar Stimulation: A type of physical interaction that simultaneously triggers sensations of both pleasure and pain.
D/s (Dominance and Submission): A relationship or play style centered around a psychological power exchange between a dominant and a submissive.
DDlg: A nurturing roleplay dynamic where a "Daddy Dom" acts as a paternal figure to a "little girl" submissive.
DM (Dungeon Monitor): A person who supervises a play space to ensure house rules are followed and to assist participants with safety needs.
Dom: A person who takes the controlling role in a BDSM dynamic, typically used as a masculine or gender-neutral term.
Dominant: The individual who exercises control and authority within a power-exchange dynamic.
Domme: A female-identifying person who takes the dominant role in a BDSM relationship or scene.
Domspace: A euphoric or highly focused state of mind experienced by a dominant during a scene.
Dungeon: A dedicated space equipped with specialized furniture and tools for engaging in BDSM activities.
Edgeplay: BDSM activities that carry a higher level of physical or emotional risk, such as breath play, bloodplay, or gunplay.
Enema Play: The use of enemas for sexual arousal, erotic humiliation, or physical sensation.
Erotic Humiliation: The act of gaining sexual pleasure from being shamed, insulted, or made to perform embarrassing acts.
Erotic Sexual Denial: The practice of keeping a partner in a state of high arousal while intentionally delaying or preventing their climax.
Erotic Spanking: The act of striking a partner's buttocks with the hands or tools for sexual gratification.
Figging: The insertion of peeled ginger root into the anus or vagina to create a burning, stimulatory sensation.
Financial Domination (Findom): A fetish where a submissive gains gratification from giving money or gifts to a dominant.
Fisting: The sexual practice of inserting a hand into the vagina or rectum.
Forced Orgasm: A scenario where a subject is brought to climax against their outward resistance or through the use of physical and mental restraints.
Free Use: A dynamic where a submissive is perpetually available for sexual activity at the dominant's discretion.
Genitorture: The intentional infliction of pain or torture on the genitals for sexual purposes.
Golden Showers: A fetish involving the act of urinating on a partner or being urinated upon.
Good Pain/Bad Pain: A distinction between "good" pain that feels arousing or satisfying and "bad" pain that signals actual injury or danger.
Gorean: A lifestyle based on the fictional slave-and-master society depicted in John Norman's "Gor" novels.
Gunplay: The inclusion of real or simulated firearms in a BDSM scene for psychological or sensory thrill.
Handkerchief Code: A color-coded system used to signal specific sexual interests and roles, typically worn in a back pocket.
Hard Limits: Activities or themes that a participant strictly refuses to engage in under any circumstances.
Hogtie: A form of bondage where a person's wrists and ankles are bound together behind their back.
Impact Play: The use of tools like floggers, paddles, or whips to strike the body for sensory stimulation.
Inspection: A roleplay scenario where a dominant examines a submissive’s body, grooming, or performance of duties.
Kinbaku (Shibari): An artistic Japanese style of rope bondage that emphasizes both technical complexity and aesthetic beauty.
Kinky Sex: Any sexual behavior that falls outside the scope of conventional or "vanilla" practices.
Knife Play: The use of knives in a scene to create psychological fear or light physical sensation without cutting the skin.
Limits: The boundaries established by participants, categorized as either non-negotiable (hard) or flexible (soft).
Masochism: The act of deriving sexual pleasure from receiving pain or humiliation.
Masochist: An individual who enjoys experiencing pain or discomfort for sexual or psychological gratification.
Master/Slave: A high-protocol D/s dynamic focused on total service and obedience, often involving 24/7 ownership.
MDLB: A roleplay dynamic where a "Mommy Domme" provides a nurturing, parental-style relationship to a "Little Boy" submissive.
Mummification: A form of intensive bondage where the entire body is wrapped in materials like plastic or fabric to achieve total immobilization.
Munch: A social gathering for kinky people held in a public, non-sexual setting to build community and network.
Needle Play: The temporary insertion of sterile needles into the skin for sensory or aesthetic purposes during a scene.
Nose Torture: A BDSM practice, often of Japanese origin, involving the use of hooks or weights on the nose.
Pain Slut: A slang term for an individual who has a high tolerance for and deeply enjoys receiving intense physical pain.
Pegging: An activity where a person (typically a woman) penetrates a male partner's anus using a strap-on dildo.
Play Party: A structured event where multiple people gather to engage in BDSM scenes in a shared space.
Ponyboy / Ponygirl: A form of animal roleplay where the submissive wears gear to mimic a horse and performs tasks like prancing or pulling a cart.
Post-Orgasm Torture: The application of painful or uncomfortable stimuli to the genitals immediately after climax when they are hyper-sensitive.
PRICK: A safety framework (Personal Responsibility, Informed, Consensual Kink) that emphasizes individual accountability and risk awareness.
Pro Dom / ProDomme: A professional who provides BDSM services or dominant experiences in exchange for payment.
Pup-play: A form of roleplay where a submissive takes on the persona and behaviors of a puppy.
Pussy Torture: The application of pain to the vulva or vagina for the purpose of sexual gratification.
RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink): A philosophy that prioritizes informed consent by ensuring all participants understand and accept the inherent risks of an activity.
Rhaphanidosis: The practice of inserting a piece of radish into the anus for sensory effect.
Rope Bondage: The use of rope to bind a partner for restraint, aesthetic beauty, or sensory experience.
Ruination: The act of interrupting or stopping an orgasm at the moment of climax to create a sense of frustration or physical discomfort.
Sadism: The act of deriving pleasure or sexual arousal from inflicting pain or discomfort on others.
Sadist: A person who finds gratification in causing physical or psychological pain to a partner.
Safeword: A pre-arranged signal used to immediately pause or stop a scene when a participant's limits are reached.
Scat Play: A fetish involving the use of feces for sexual or psychological stimulation.
Scene: A specific period of BDSM activity with defined roles, goals, and boundaries.
Sensation Play: Activities focused on creating physical feelings—such as temperature, texture, or impact—rather than psychological power exchange.
Service Submission: A submissive role focused on performing helpful tasks or chores for a dominant.
Slave: A person who consensually gives up control of significant aspects of their life to a Master or Mistress.
Soft Limit: An activity that a participant is hesitant about or willing to try only under specific, controlled conditions.
Squick: A term used to describe a feeling of intense personal distaste or "ick" toward a specific kink without passing moral judgment.
SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual): A foundational BDSM guideline advocating for activities that are physically safe, mentally sound, and mutually agreed upon.
Sub Drop: A period of physical or emotional exhaustion and vulnerability that can occur after a high-intensity scene.
Submissive: A person who consensually yields control and power to another for a specific duration or lifestyle.
Subspace: An altered, euphoric state of consciousness reached by a submissive during intense BDSM play.
Switch: An individual who enjoys taking on both dominant and submissive roles depending on the partner or context.
Tit Torture: The deliberate application of pain to the breasts or nipples for erotic purposes.
TNG (The Next Generation): A community label for BDSM groups specifically catering to younger participants, typically between ages 18 and 35.
Top: The person who performs the actions in a scene, regardless of whether they are psychologically dominant.
Topping from the Bottom: An often derogatory term for a submissive attempting to control or direct a scene outside of pre-negotiated boundaries.
TPE (Total Power Exchange): A relationship where the submissive consensually grants the dominant full authority over all aspects of their life.
Training: The process by which a dominant teaches a submissive specific behaviors, protocols, or skills.
Vanilla: A term used to describe sexual activities or individuals that do not involve BDSM or kink.
Wax Play: The practice of dripping melted, low-temperature candle wax onto a partner's skin for sensory stimulation.
WIITWD (What It Is That We Do): A broad, inclusive phrase used to describe the entire spectrum of alternative sexualities and kinks.